Oh great and magnanimous waidersrv,

I invoke your powers,

I sacrifice this 3M High Density 1.44MB floppy loaded with Lucent
proprietary GDMO information model code,

That you, oh great waidersrv will show the way and exorcise the evil
WINDOWS from our home-computing device,

I scribble on the label with luminous orange highlighter and while
incanting your glorious title I inscribe your name 14 times, 
waidersrv, waidersrv,  waidersrv waidersrv,  waidersrv waidersrv waidersrv, 
waidersrv, waidersrv,  waidersrv waidersrv,  waidersrv waidersrv waidersrv, 

May you be generous in your omnipotence and deign to answer our
pitiful inquiries into disk partitioning and the installation and
configuration of Linux,

I flip the read-write tab back and forth and set it to read only to
symbolise the one true source of all informaition - the waidersrv,

We implore of you, oh great one, give us advice on the partitioning of
our drives, so that E: may be reborn as E: and F:, or maybe that the
whole of our 3.3G hard-drive may be reborn without losing the present
C: partition on which resides the evil Microsoft software.

I lever off the slidy-thing with my bare thumb and expose the
magnetic store of knowledge, it gives with a satisfying click as it detaches.

We pray that to OS Linux will be happy to reside on two seperate
partitions and that it will forgive the users for preserving the
Microsoft evil, periodic sacrifices will be offered for this sacrelige
to relieve the plagues of corrupted memory and hard-disk failure. 

I bend the metal slidy-thing backwards and in half, it tears and lies
there twisted and contorted.

We shall treat old Microsoft software with the same contempt,
not de-installing, but physically deleting from the hard-drive and
over-writing using the GNU standard licencing agreement.

I scratch the exposed magnetic floppy material with this pen writing
"watashi wa sakana desu" in arcane nihongo figures,

I rotate the disc an imperfect 90 degrees and inscribe the evil of
this universe, Microsoft :-E,

I rotate another 90 and inscribe the saviour Linus, another 90 and the
fountain of the waidersrv is invoked.

Through the revolutions of our CD-ROM may the installation of Linux
from the InfoMagic Linux Developers Resource (Red Hat 5.0, Kernel
source 2.0.33 and 2.1.79, SuSE 5.1, Linux archives, GNU archive, 
Slackware 3.4, Metro-X 4.1, XFree86 3.3.1, Apache WWW for Linux 1.2.5,
Lesstif for Linux 0.82, Complete on-line docs & HOWTO's AND
Installation and Networking guide) be unhindered,

I IMPLORE thee oh great waidersrv!

I take a blue pen and insert it, cracking the casing of the floppy in
two, corrupting the magnetic surface, I pull mightily with my hands
and the floppy cracks lying bare and exposed before me, the spring and
read-write tab fall loose to be discarded.

I place them with the bent slidy-thing on the 6-CD Linux set.

Taking the empty shell I inscribe invocations to the waidersrv on the
protecting material and tear the material apart in symbolic emulation
of corrupted run-time memory paging.

I take this half of the plastic shell and perform the origami
bird-base folds that peace shall reign on hard-drive, in memory and
with various IO devices.

We implore thee that the interface of Linux to modems and ports will
become clear to us.

Finally, I take the holy magnetic disk itself, with this stapler I
puncture and dent the surface, I render the information completely
corrupt, it is imperfect, and deserves to be desecrated.

This I sacrifice to you oh great waidersrv, 

to your depthless fountain of magnet^H^Himonious power.